Predicting the future has become so passe that we now like to predict the past. Visiting the funhouse of colossal gaffes gone wild might even be worthwhile were it not for the egocentric nature of such excursions. The one doing the recollecting and post-mortem whistle-blowing typically prescribes himself a completely passive role in the train wreck that was, or issues himself the “greater forces at work” stamped pass that magically absolves a revisionary time traveler of all culpability. Those passes are not dispensed with impunity, mind you. All the other idiots should have seen the disaster coming.
In an ever-changing present, I break from the modern day Gong Show of Monday morning quarterbacking to let my mind’s eye drift into the mystic. I tire of the talk of the past, find myself all blabbed out about the present and abhor the prostrate card counting by a one-eyed chimpanzee with a broken abacus that epitomizes the prediction of the future. The derivative credit swaps. The zero down, no doc loans. The found equity. The lost equity. The sublime and the subprime. The mortgage backed securities. The short sales. The banks. The credit crunch. The jobs report. The DOW. The tax credit. The fund rate. Cats and dogs, living together … I just can’t take it anymore. I am bored to tears with the round the clock exhumation schedule for the late housing market. Let the poor bastard rest in peace already. We ideological grave-robbers have already deprived the putrid corpse of its dignity, we can at least leave the watch and gold fillings.
There is no full accounting for or understanding of this place in which we find ourselves. There is no single factor other than our own human nature that can be isolated and excised from our collective evolution to preclude future bouts of similarly convergent idiocy.
The takeaway in it all?
“Shit happens. Let’s get a taco”
I am out of ways to say “bankers suck.” I refuse to foretell where home values will be in the year 2075. Constrained by the whole time-space continuum thing, it leaves a guy with a dearth of topical options.
Shall we open up a Real Estate worm hole and do a little time & space bending?
We interrupt the regularly scheduled “underwriters are evil” broadcast for a test of the Retroactive Emergency Optimism System.
The year is 2010. It looks a lot like our 2010, only the people are cleaner. No eight day stubble on every other unemployed neighbor who barricades himself inside the home he hasn’t made on a payment on in twelve months. No ghost towns where entire developments went under, leaving the lone resident to weigh the safety of his fallout shelter against the siege perpetuated by advancing weeds and greening swimming pools. No “declining value” markers in appraisal reports.
It’s the world you know, only in Technicolor.
Turns out the bubble never burst. All of those admonitions to get into a home before being priced out forever were prescient after all. Flippers kept flipping, buyers kept buying and lenders kept lending until entry-level housing in the greater Phoenix area hit the $750,000 mark. A million dollars sure doesn’t buy a million dollar home anymore. The luxury market doesn’t start in earnest until you hit the 2.5 mil range. As equity abounds, the financial markets never took the nose dive. Happy homeowners continue to borrow against lines of credit to purchase yachts, cars, more houses … more happiness. Happy homebuyers can obtain financing to purchase waterfront property on a McDonald’s shift manager’s salary and refi out of them when the teaser rates adjust. The water tastes like wine, and the wine tastes God.
We all sing Kumbaya by Alan Greenspan’s campfire.
Of course, the bad news is that our kids aren't going to care much for the fact that most have been offered up as collateral. Or rather, their future earnings equity has been tapped by their legal guardians to pay for the stable of ponies they were "given" for their fifth birthdays or the eight dollar per gallon cost of filling up the new Toyota Ginorma on the way to and from soccer practice. The really bad news is that the Treasury Department is bundling this government backed debt and selling it to China to finance the new lunar public housing project. Default on that pony and your kid might as well start practicing his Mandarin.
Hmm. This doesn't look like the land of milk and honey, after all.
There is no Utopia, even where we perceive it to lie. There's just this petri dish we call life. Move the cultures around all you like; slice them up and rearrange to your heart's content, but you are left with the same roiling purgatory of flawed inhabitants. Scrape off the undesirable elements and they ball together with other cast off malignancies to form the latest unholy global terror.
No matter how much we revel in the vicarious thrill of plotting a course to where we should be instead of where we ended up, there is no rationalizing ourselves out of the daily human struggle for relevance. Likewise, there is no girding against all future woe by merely finding obsolete solutions to past catastrophe. Solving one of life's great mysteries only re-scrambles the rubix cube. Just when you line up the blues and reds, green comes along and drags them both back into the grey.
Though we may be temporary stewards of this earth, we are still but passengers on a cosmic ride to a final destination unknown. No sense fretting about the in-flight entertainment when we have no say in the matter. We get to adjust the air flow through the overhead nozzle, position the seatbacks and select a beverage from amongst the Pepsi products (sorry, no Coke).
The rest is out of our hands.
Changing metaphorical horses midstream, what say we leave the study of our recent fossil record to future historians and get on with finding a way out of this tar pit? It doesn't care how we got here or where we were heading, but it will welcome our carbon to its bottomless depths if we don't take a narrow view of the immediate task at hand. There is a time for academia, and there is a time for action.
Work on your housing thesis if you prefer, but I'm grabbing a frigging rope.
And with that, I climb over the emaciated body of Real Estate past and direct this blog to matters only of immediate benefit to today's consumer. Self-indulgence, thy name is Mud from hence forth.
As to the very nature of the problems we now face, we've got it relatively easy when examined against the broad spectrum of possibility. I, for one, thank my lucky stars that the hobgoblin which reads us to sleep in the here and now is but a simple economic beasty. Beats the flesh-eating amoebas that are terrorizing a parallel 2010. Or the Rosie O’Donnell / Janet Reno mud wrestling match that incapacitates yet another. While A + B does not always equal C these days, at least it doesn’t equal rectal typhoid.
Except on days that end in "y," that is.
Times are hard, but when are they not? You'll read no more "woe is me" type bellyaching from this here scribe. I'll gladly take the seven/deuce offset suits we've received from this crooked dealer and try to bluff us through to the next hand.
How will we fare?
Beats me, I'm not into predictions. But I ain't rolling over for this market anymore.
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You tell 'em Paul! These would be great lyrics. Now you just need to hook up with Baba Brinkman and you'll have yourself a hit. Oops, that sounded like a compliment...I'll have to be more careful in the future...don't want the mean girls after me.
Mean Girls: I'm sorry, I just don't have your wit and couldn't think of any clever put downs. I'll leave that to the masters.
I think I can go ahead and speak for them, Kristen.
"What the Hell are you talking about, Paul?"
"Beats me, I'm not into predictions. But I ain't rolling over for this market anymore."
THAT should be a bumper sticker, or wall embroidery.
I'm exhausted now...Every time I get through the first paragraph, it reminds me of my college philosophy days, where I realized how small my brain was.
The thing that really resonated with me was every time I look at my two kids and the whole future generation legacy, I cringe on what historians will think about our consumption habits compared to the rest of the world, and the mess that we leave them. On the other hand, having circumnavigated the globe (courtesy of the US Navy), and going to various far-less-fortunate countries, I still think I'm living in 90210, even if I'm far from it.
This post reminds me of a scene from Hannah and Her Sisters -- where Woody Allen's dad is making toast in the morning while Woody is extolling the mystery of God, beliefs, etc., and he asked his father: Do you believe in God? His father, scruffy, bathrobe on, said: I don't even know how the toaster works! -- That's how I feel when I hear/see all this conflicting info on a daily basis.
My solution: make a better margarita, conserve, and go grab my mitt to play catch with my son. I'll leave the rest to the idiots in charge who probably don't have a much better clue than I do on how to solve these issues.
Dollars to donuts that the expression is in print somewhere, Lenn. There are no new ideas anymore. ;)
Chris, I am equally exhausted from penning this. I've had this damn thing sitting in my draft editor for several days now. Must have tweeked the verbiage 100 times, and it still didn't turn out right. Too many metaphors, too many thoughts ... just too much all around. Sounded simple enough in my head, just didn't want to translate into print. Probably the most stubborn piece I have ever posted here in that regard. Would have just scrapped it for the lack of clarity, but I put too much time into it. So thar she blows up above.
Onto the meat of your comment, I think you have just stumbled upon the secret to life in those last three sentences.
Paul, dude, all I can think to say is...where are you going for them tacos?
And Chris, amen to your solution!
strap em on and lace em up tight, we are in for a bumpy ride. That's ok, would be fun any other way?
There are other literary devices besides the metaphor. Sometimes less is more.
We as a nation have long ago given up on taking responsibility for our part and take pride in passing the buck to others. This mess has always been about all of us but it is much easier to say it is about someone else, rather than say, "I had a part in this too." That would require each individual to change their behavior...and that is not something most people want to do. As such...the moaning goes on.
Me. I think you are crazy going for tacos without a margarita, preferably an Oregon marionberry margarita. I mean get your priorties straight. ;-D
Now you tell me, J. Phillip.
Michael - Bumpy rides can land a stewardess in one's lap.
Mike - it's a hundred and million on the thermometer here today. If there is a good taco joint up your way, I'm there.
Oh, but Paul - there is no way to mess up the Rubik's cube, unless you are actually trying to solve the damn thing instead of doing specific sets of prescribed moves to always end up with the thing solved, in under 2 minutes.:-)
That aside - you EDIT? I am so bloody jealous now, it's not even funny. Last thing I edited was my name on a marriage license.
I enjoyed every metaphore in this post, Paul, and then some. Sometimes more is not enough, to paraphrase J.Philip.
Hi Chris, Hi Melina.":-)
Melina, you come from a background in psychology. You should have known better than to read this thing all the way through. Less a blog post than an assault on the cerebellum.
Kudos to those of you brave souls with enough unscrambled grey matter to compose a comment after trying to make heads or tails of the content. I swear there's a point in there somewhere. ;)
Hi Inna :)
I usually only edit when I don't like how something sounds the first time through, or if I think I can say something a bit more clearly. Obviously, it is not a foolproof methodology. ;)
Ah Ha...
I think I finally understood something you wrote. Thanks to Inna, I read the whole thing metaphorically. No, I have no idea why I haven't tried that already :)
I actually enjoy a good pointless metaphor. Who knew? :)
TLW...ROAR!
Of all posts, this is the one that makes the most sense to you, TLW? Now that says something. I'm not exactly sure what, but definitely something. ;)
Lol...
I know what it says, but I can't tell you here. I'll catch up to your Face :)
TLW...ROAR!
Great post. FYI, the drug combination you're on is working and remember, don't bogart them, pass them over to me.
Paul - I agree that our particular hobgoblin is a fairly minor minion. Sure his 7-2 may outdraw our rockets, but he never has a big enough stack to take us all the way out of the game. With a chip and a chair, the game goes on. That chip may be no more than the ability to swing a hammer, put pen to paper, or convince willing buyers and sellers to get together on a dance floor. And, it may be a slow, painful grind to get back to average. But, the possibility exists. The demons lurking in the closet offer no such hope.
Melina - I read Paul's post twice and your comment 3 times. Try as might, I just can't comprehend Oregon Margarita's.
If you are standing behind me at the pharmacy, Joe, it's gonna be a long wait. ;)
Erik - I am likewise trying to ascertain what a Marion Berry Margarita entails. Whatever it may be, I'm guessing you can only legally drink one for medicinal purposes.
I couldn't help but think of my mom's story of me and my friend. We were arguing. Mom made her leave and sent me to my room to think about it. I guess it wasn't the first time. So when she asked me why I made our playtime an argument, yet, again, I said, "But, moooom, it's so fun." I guess some of us still talk about the s.o.s. because we think it's fun while others have learned to go have a taco. Enjoyed your post, as always!
Erik... We have a good sized Hispanic population in Oregon so we have many Mexican restaurants. Some are fusion, blending Mexican foods with local ingrediants...hence the marionberry margarita. Marionberries (a cross between a raspberry and blackberry) make killer margaritas. Your only choice is to visit my state in the summer months and try one. We can talk about Paul while you are here ;-D
Hi Inna.
Nothing much to do and much to do about nothing! So I'll only do what I can do something about and nothing about something that has nothing I can do!
The End
:)
Jeezus jumped up Christ in a Mustang, my frontal lobe feels like it was just hit by a telepathic ninja...Nobody writes like Slaybaugh. Nobody. That could be a good thing, or a bad thing. Take your choice. Who else could conjure up a Rosie O'Donnell/Janet Reno wrestling match and come away unscathed? I for one am glad to be a fellow passenger on this cosmic plane ride to who-knows-where. All I ask, Paul, is that when the stewardess gets to your seat up there in First Class, tell her not to forget us stiffs back in Coach.
Salut!
Paul,
One thing son......every morning you wake up. If you actually try to live a decent life, you will spend you life with an o.k. person. If you live your life with no regards for others (you may be an asshole), you will spend you life with a person that has no regards for others.
What occurs as we pass............has little merit........
Our passage is just time spent.
Who wants to spend their life with an asshole.
Be nice and let the rest sort it self out.
Now get back in the sandbox and play nice.
Good.
"Catch the wind, see us spin..."
Maybe better.
"It seems that the wrath of the gods got a punch on the nose, And it's startin' to flow, I think I might be sinkin'
Throw me a line, if I reach it in time, Meet you up there where the path runs straight and high..."
Or maybe best
"With all the fun to have, to live the dreams we always had
Oh, the songs to sing, when we at last return again..."
Onward and upward, go forth and conquer, Be here now.
Or my personal favorite:
"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."
Now about those Marionberry Margaritas...
Paul,
If you could put that to music, sounds like a Dylan song.
Rich
Bob Dylan with a mouth full of marbles is more coherent, Richard.
Paul, I used to be known as academically brilliant. Why? I have no idea and neither did my mother who was absolutely flabbergasted to hear me described that way by the grammar school principal. You leave me in the dust. Truly. Your intelligence is on an entirely different plane (sorry girls).
I don't like to do the woe is me dance either and I will just keep working away, walking the walk and doing the best I can. In the end the best of ourselves is all we can give.
I'm OK with saying "Shit happens and let's all go get a taco" as long as I don't have to be left cleaning up the shit or paying for the shit to be cleaned up that others created. I don't want to reward the people who caused the shit to happen or else it's more likely to happen again. That's why we need to try to figure out who caused the shit.
When my dog shits in the park, I'm there with a bag to clean it up. I get to enjoy my dog and I deal with the shit that happens. I don't believe others should be burdened with the shit that my dog creates even though it might affect their enjoyment of the park. Now if the pet store sold me a dog and promised me that it would never shit, then I think the pet store holds some responsibilty for the clean up and maybe be forced to stop telling people that their dogs never shit. But I also remain responsible for being so gullible to believe such a thing.
You my friend must have been eating a whole heap of existentialist pie over the weekend.
Predicting the past is no more fruitful than predicting the future is. Only difference, those who do the latter either get enormously swelled heads from being right, or have their egos crushed into oblivion (at least one would hope) from being wrong...
Don't make these musings of yours so scarce. They make for a fun read, and cause many to think, at least...
I'm with Tim.
I actually think that Paul is a very good writer, and I admire his voyages into very seldom-traveled styles on Active Rain.
Heck, I tell folks I broke my crystal ball back in 1984!
Third paragraph is both a mouth full AND a head full but you sum it up nicely in the next three sentence's (so...Tim, please have a taco and RELAX)
I love reading your stuff and even have to pry out the dictionary with you now and then. It's always technicolor all the time ;-) Of course you must know that this also reminded me of one of my fave Zepplin songs http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsf0sY_mJtg&feature=related
Still love the bass line and the rest of this song as much as I did when listening to it on vinyl and 8-Track so long ago and you MUST turn it up!
Tim, fair enough, but in terms of warding off future calamity by trying to unwind this ludicrous mess, it's futile. The lessons to be learned moving forward are the large scale truths, not the minutiae. Assigning culpability may be necessary to dispense justice, but the game changes too readily for that knowledge to translate into deterrence. Figuring out the specifics of yesterday's scheme and/or failing is already obsolete in terms of the hazards that lie ahead. We knew the warning signs then as well as we know them now, and we still jumped into the abyss of our own volition. We'll do so again at some point, regardless of how many "lessons" we mine from this meltdown. It's our nature. If there is one thing you can say about humanity, it's that we are unfailingly predictable. Our efforts to right past wrongs are simply the latest flailings of the same not-quite-swimming-not-quite-drowning species.
What the hell are you talking about, Paul?
Posts like this are why I've been lurking on Active Rain for a year and have yet to post anything. Simply put, "I'm not worthy!" Thanks for the brilliant post and entertaining comments - this is why I love AR!
The state of the current real estate market "is what it is". My opinion? Let's put on our big girl/boy undies and deal with it!
William - Thanks, buddy. Sometimes these literary excursions actually lead somewhere. Then there are posts like these that just end up on some nondescript side street. I guess Sunday is as good a day as any for a meandering tour of the subconscious. ;)
Russell - Zeppelin is my very first love. 8 tracks were just a bit before my time, but my mother had me singing the lyrics to the fourth album on family road trips at the age of six. Thanks for the link and the comment, my man.
Susan - The surest way to confusing an audience into thinking you know more than you do is to string together multi-syllabic word sequences that make absolutely zero sense. Never mistake lack of clarity for a higher plane of thought. ;)
Elaine - You are a barefoot karaoke party waiting to happen.
J-Mac - Now that has the ring of truth. "Be nice" ... my new mission statement.
Wayne - I only scored first class from the miles I built up hopping these bi-weekly flights between lucidity and madness. We know you have a choice in your metaphysical travel. Thanks for flying the freaky skies with us. ;)
Jody - That's going on my business card.
Kristen - I like to beat a spent pinata as much as the next guy, pointless though it may be. Nothing is quite as healthy for the soul as senseless fustigation. In the case of the Real Estate pinata, I am simply all fiesta'd out.
Hi Lisa :)
Jill - Thanks for giving me a read. I would heap a bunch of "jump right in, the water's fine" type of AR metaphors right now, but I have shot my quota for the next month. ;) I'll simply hope that you are not deterred from leveraging this forum out of self-doubt. Nobody comes to a Real Estate site to find Poe. It's the content and unique perspective you can offer an audience that will dictate your likely success.
Besides, I find it's usually those most hesitant who have a gift they are shy about sharing. A hundred buck says you are nervous about sharing your writing because you actually have the talent to worry about how it will be received. Those with a hit or miss ability to spell "cat" are not all that hesitant. No potential for embarrassment when you already know you suck.
For the record, this one took some nerve for me to post. I wasn't at all sure about the finished product when I hit submit. I've never been timid about posting, but this one caused a fair amount of anguish. Turning it loose, knowing that it wasn't my finest work, was incredibly liberating. "Here's my piece, warts and all. Deal with it."
So what say you? Willing to take a risk?
I'm guessing that you have little kids and have not yet had to endure the multi-level Graphic Organizer introduced in Advanced Language Arts in middle school. This Graphic Organizer is an outline for writers who have some brain function. The Graphic Organizer is supposed to help develop the writer to develop persuasive, expository or narrative essays (I just asked the boy child about essay types and he responded "you sell houses, why would you care about categorizing essays, but here's the answer"). I can send you some goldenrod sheets of blank Graphic Organizers if you'd like..my kids ignore them so we have extras.
So if I may, let's parse your Holden Caulfield episode and sort out your thoughts. You lament the seemingly random -- or possibly evil -- series of events that have resulted in over-mortgaged ponies.
But you end up in a pretty good place: "what's the takeaway"?
First, my takeaway from your essay is clearly not "shit happens". Unless you're a fundamentalist, you probably will agree that events and their subsequent results are created by human decisions. Developing the smallpox vaccine, or writing Mein Kampf, or composing the 5th Symphony, or driving drunk and killing someone, or having sex on a particular Thursday night and creating your son are significant human events. Forget "good" or "evil" -- just think significant. It's much harder to think than to dismiss the world as an endless series of chaotic events.
Second, you get to decide -- for yourself and for your kids -- to leave behind "shit happens" and stop yer bellyachin. I am seeing more and more of us with homes and luxury cars and ponies and way too many American Girl dolls are stopping and saying "huh?...we did what for so many years?". I really think we're going to be OK, the sell-off to China not withstanding. And you know what, you kind of have to decide that you're going to work with what we have... or you need to go buy a few hundred acres in Idaho and live off the grid.
I enjoy your writing.....although I have been admonished NOT to encourage you, I really do think that you have something to say...somewhere...there's a pony in there.
Ah, but human decisions are dictated by events. Would we know of Dr. Jonas Salk had polio not been the pre-cursor for his fame? I believe that shit does indeed happen, though I pointedly undersell our reactionary role to how we cope with and adapt to said cosmic excrement. That minor chicken and the egg nit notwithstanding, I agree with your conclusions. We will overcome, even if only to make way for the next self-inflicted gunshot wound. It's what we do. Underneath all of this cynicism lies the naive heart of an optimist. Everything in its place, everything as it should be, with a little random anarchy thrown in for some sadistic God's amusement. My hope is that the silver lining to this cloudy economy is what is ultimately remembered from this time: The end of conspicuous consumption as the world knows it. If that is to play out, it won't be through the kangaroo court's assignment of fault, but out of self-preservation from the burned participants.
Holy shit - intelligent conversation on AR.... I just peed a little.
Carry on...
Paul,
Good post until half way though. A little constructive critism; throw some clip art in there. The wall of words had my eyes glazing over.
LOL!
I already fell on my sword for this one, you bunch of jackals. Stop picking at my carcass.
What an excellent post. Times are hard indeed. All I know is that I feel so much more blessed to be raising my son in this 2010 that we currently occupy than the parallel 2010. Had we stayed there my very soul would have been destroyed.
Too many metaphors or not, I believe there to be wisdom in this here piece of prose. Throw in the obscure humor and it usually turns out to be a good read in my view.
And are we really sure that the wall of words had Chenier's eyes glazed over? Visious rumors abound that he could give Willie Nelson a run for his money in Beer Pong Bong.
Besides, I don't need no clip art. A subtle link to a youtube video of the Rosie O'Donnell / Janet Reno mud wrestling match would have been pretty sweet, though.
The more things change, the more the stay the same - hahaha
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3zSV19AksQ
And, the oil continues to "leak" and the BP continues to "contain it".
I am not predicting either...not now...not ever.
We can only list and sell in the market we are in. If it appraises in 2010 there can be no prediction up or down for 2012 or beyond.
Lisa - Good to see you again. Hope all is well in your current 2010.
Sardi - I'm not a big clip-art guy either. Stopped reading illustrated books as a lad. While this piece certainly asks more of a reader than a typical blog post, I shudder for our society if a page and a half of paragraphed text compels us to seek shelter from the verbal assault. We. Are. Doomed.
Gregory - Nicely played. And the beat goes on ...
Missy - A sage practice. I get asked all the time for my expectations of where a potential home will be valued in three to five years time. Is it wrong of me to respond in yen?
Paul - esteemed Mr. Chenier wants clip-art - I say he shall have his clip-art.
Hi Elaine, Hi Melina.
And, if I may, to Jill - you just got the highly coveted Paul Slaybaugh bump, now go on with your bad self and post something. You already have fans:-)
We all have our preferences, Inna. I won't kill a guy for his, but I happen think the formula of inserting graphics for the mere sake of inserting graphics is one of the greatest scourges to befall blogging. It's literature by the numbers. USA Today style journalism. Sure, it's easier on the eyes, but what's wrong with encouraging a reader to think? Not every piece is intended to be a readily digestible message that one hammers home with visual reinforcement and bold/italicized font. I prefer the reader to think along with me (instead of being told what to think) unless it is a pure marketing piece.
I just flagged this post for #$@%!?#@ language....
oh, I almost forgot....
"NOW is a really GREAT time to Buy or Sell a House!".....
Paul, that was great. Got me all fired up. I just wonder... Seems to me that most agents I talk to, and most in my office, are sitting around waiting for the "good ol' days" to somehow come back and save the day. Is this the same hope that the mastadons had while stumbling into those tar pits?
Paul -- can I call you Paul? -- I thought I was going to like you but somewhere up there you said "be nice" is your new motto? Are you sure that's what you want? I spent an hour with my broker tonight on listing stuff and we came out of it shaking our heads, sharpening our pencils and our claws. The business had changed way, way too much to think about "being nice". If you want to be in a helping profession, there are other places with less angst and liability. But I guess if you leave the graphics out I'll stick around -- but are you sure you don't want the Graphic Organizers I offered earlier?
I liked the Led Zeppelin title reference. I didn't even bother reading the rest. No, just kidding Paul. Very Zen like, your new found approach to the current market. But get back to me when the negotiator your working with on one of the many short sales your doing tells you they never received the offer and you have to send it AGAIN! For the 7th time. I think the "banks suck" mantra will return. Great post and best of luck to you.
I'm sorry, that last comment was itchy with a "b". There should be a little icon (maybe an empty wine glass) that you get to use when you send an email or write a comment before dinner. I can't always communicate with the humor I intend...although it was a very, very long day...and I get to write yet another market tonight.
I think I'm liking this Ebersole gal ... Amish Portrait and all;)
Jason, you mock me but you know not wherist you go. First, that headshot is a leftover from my corporate days (and I mean very, very corporate days of weathergirl hair helmet headshots). I will get a new photo when I can cope with it. And the Ebersole Amish reference.....my ex's family was Mennonite, not Amish, as he so fervently protested over the years. I guess if you grew up a Catholic former Mennonite in Lancaster you developed identity problems.
Jacobson - Pretty sure someone else already beat you to that flag. ;)
Eric - A whole lot of that around my office last year, but less so this year. Everyone I come across lately seems to have an angle, in a good way. Perhaps because we circled the toilet sooner and longer than most, the memo has finally been received that 2005 is not coming back. Anymore, we'd all settle for 2002. Or 1999. Or ... well, almost anything between 1993 and 2004. Until we get it, though, I see agents finally getting back to work. Never seen a more "nichefied" market. If one doesn't specialize in REOs, it's short sales. If not short sales, then first time buyers. I see more agents handling rentals than in the past. Interesting times.
Leslie - No worries. Nice has always been more of a theoretical thing with me. The psychic told me to try new things, so thought I'd give benevolence a try. I would have had it down, too, were it not for the a$$h&1es that kept sabotaging my best efforts. As it pertains to biz, I am very nice. To my clients. Everyone else can grab a lance as far as I am concerned.
Jerry - I've had said conversation. It requires the Zen of Seinfeld: "Serenity Now!"
Sardi - Now you've done it.
If I ever get out of my teenage years, I'll be more precise with appropriate links.
Not to worry, though. My portrait ain't breaking down Calvin Klein's Walls.
I grew up not far from Lancaster, right here in Pennsylvania. Clarion, to be exact. We referenced Lancaster as the place where the plumbing goes ...
Kidding aside, I'll see you around.
Hi Paul, Congrats. Some of the comments are very interesting. Some envy your wit Paul, others celebrate it. You do get some great reactions in the comment section.
i enjoyed your post, and the Led Zep reference (MY fav band..i even went to the reuinio at the 02 in London...front row!). You sure did receive many comments but i have recently picked up (again), The Elements of Style by William Shrunk...i know it is vintage but its specific and to the point. I thinik we could all use a bit of Shrunk, eh?
:)
upon us all a little rain must fall...
You know, after reading this anew, it wouldn't have been half bad had I edited out two extraneous paragraphs. Oh well. You pays your quarter, you takes your chances.
William - I don't see envy. I do see honest criticism. Most of it is warranted and taken under advisement for future efforts. While there are a select few whose opinions I value above all others, I welcome all critiques. Even the ones I unceremoniously denounce. It's impossible to improve when fed nothing but a steady diet of praise.
Suzanne - I confess to not being familiar with Mr. Shrunk, but I now plan to be by the end of the day. Thanks.
Interesting...
One of the most talented Bloggers we have around here is actually being told what to do by a newer member. That's flucked up :)
TLW...ROAR!
No worries, TLW :)
Inspiration can come from unexpected sources. Sometimes the newer peeps, not knowing enough to revere the longer tenured members, come at things from a fresh perspective that can be of benefit to those who think they know it all. I can learn from the guy who just signed up yesterday (who knows what life experience he brings with him) as much as the guy who invented the Internet (Thanks, Al).
Of course, in this case, the jury is still deliberating ... ;)
Suzanne - I ain't never read that particular vintage gem, but i beez hoping here that esteemed Mr. Shrunk addressed the use of the apostrophe.
Hi Lovely. :-)
damn...I do edit my public post's, and those moments when I feel compelled to comment on a post, (and trust me the post's I comment on are noteworthy or why bother?), sometimes I write too quickly and i have errors. I enjoyed Paul's post though maybe I will keep my heartfelt comments to my self..? I meant no disrespect, and i have learned much here.
"The Queen of Light took her bow and then she turned to go
The Prince of Peace embraced the gloom and walked the night alone
Oh, dance in the dark night, sing to the morning light
The Dark Lord rides in force tonight, and time will tell us all"
:)
Suzanne - I saw no disrespect in your comment, and hope you don't refrain from adding your thoughts to future posts. I meant what I said. I learn far more from the comments that make me examine my thoughts and efforts than the run of the mill pats on the back. Your email was much appreciated as well.
Don't be a stranger.
Suzanne - don't mind me. I am just a snarky little pest at times, but god knows I don't take myself too seriously, nor do I expect anyone else to... Soooo - what Paul said.:-)
Hi Inna...
Shall we start doing some bitch slapping together? :)
Slaybaugh...
I'm sorry (not really) but the cartoon people have nothing to teach me :)
P.S. Okay. So maybe i'm in a mood this afternoon. Shhh. Don't tell anyone :)
TLW...ROAR!
I've heard of Shrunk. Ignored the bastard.
As the Paul Slaybaugh official pat on the backer, I can assure you there is nothing "run of the mill about it". Just saying.
As I suggested, Suze, some opinions are more highly valued than others. Nothing in the least bit run of the mill about a Mangiggly pinch on the blogging cheek. ;)
Well, there's probably no more compelling background music for blogging than a tune from Carly Simon..."....you probably think this song is about you".
As I revisit various blog conversations after yet another long day (actually selling real estate, thank goodness) in my mind I am running over on-going internal conversations...what to do, what to do?
I work for a pretty large (1600 agent) independent brokerage that's been gettin' by for 155 years. Perhaps because of (or perhaps despite) deep cultural and historical roots, we continue to sell a lot of real estate for people. We are rapidly -- daily -- reinventing the business that we run, rethinking where we eat and live, what we do and how we do it. Our expectations about the roles and activities of a Realtor are changing. Excursions via social media into the minds, practices, attitudes and behaviors of agents, brokers, lenders and clients is not for entertainment -- although it certainly is entertaining). We're running a business...not a political forum, or a hopeful lead generation effort (oops, another swing and a miss), or a short-lived but ill-fated referral ploy.
What used to be done in expensive focus groups and an unending series of recruiting interviews can now be accomplished in hours -- the "what" and "how" of "what's happening" in field sales.
Years ago, in reaction to an industry analyst report, a senior marketing guy I worked for said "It's better to be looked over than overlooked". A pretty good floor for thinking about social media.
I'm just here for the happy hour.
I am with Paul - happy hour.
Happy hour? I'm doing -- or not doing -- a BMA on a home that can't be priced and I'm fending off angst and boredom with rants on other people's blogs. Someone should take away my key board.
Metaphor Shmetaphor... All I can say is hard or soft? Ummm...taco that is... lmao
::tapping foot:: What happened to happy hour?
You said shit...
Well if it isn't the X-Featured Broker. ;)
Rapose - Whatever you have heard about me is patently untrue.
Leslie - Keep the keyboard, add sangria.
Lisa and Inna - Keep your pour hands limber. Happy hour is a 24/7 gig around here.
Who said "shit"?
Bartender, I'll take mine spank your ass dirty with an olive the size of Kanzas, and make it snappy.
Goodness, when did this become the Grammar 101 class? and who needs Strunk when you can develop your own style by just being your true-blue self? Only the literary challenged...
Suzanne, we need more poets. that was a lovely dither there...
Leslie - you get to keep the keyboard. It might come in handy to smack some sense into someone, lol.
Jeff, when Sugar-Honey-Iced-Tea becomes demeaning and offensive to iced tea drinkers, then we'll all have hell to pay for it.
Ah, let the hijacking begin...or am I late to the party?
Oh, I forgot why I popped back over - Slaybaugh, and for all of the other real fathers here, Happy Father's Day. Ladies, give us our due today...then tomorrow, it can be back to business as usual....